Embrace the Struggle...as real as it is.

I don't even know what to really say but I know I've got to get out this feeling I'm having this morning.  It was not a restful night last night and my 5:00, 5:15 and 5:30 alarm went off, very quietly this morning.  I had my ringer turned down and they did not wake me.  When I did wake up 2 hours late I walked into the bathroom started getting ready, stepped on the scale, then got back in the bed.  WHY? do I do that too myself?

Image belongs to PBS
I sat here and looked up meal plans for women who are bodybuilding.  Yes, I want a lean body that has muscle.  Not like a crazy weird looking morph of a woman/bodybuilder.  Just lean and muscle, fit.  I get so

A Content Heart

Jake, my youngest, had a dentist appointment this morning.  He's had a tooth that's been bothering him and I we thought he was going to have it capped.  When the dentist looked at it again he decided it should be pulled.  They adjusted my bill and handed me the estimate.  I can not tell you the defeat that washed over me when I saw the amount due today.


I went back to my chair and stared at the number $555.45 was written large and circled in the top right hand corner.  My heart had sunk for my baby boy and I sat and blamed myself.  My imagination had him kicking and screaming under the doctors bright light like in the movies.  I went to the bathroom and stood in front of the mirror trying not to get sick and holding back tears.  My head was saying...Bad Mom, Bad Mom, Bad Mom. 

Cinderella's 10 Tips to Keeping it Simple

Once Upon a Time there was a Mom with 3 Sons...well, 3 plus a dog named Hiccup and a husband.


I have to share really quick...Today, I downloaded an app that I am hoping I will stay addicted too.  It's called "Tody" and I scheduled cleaning all over my house by area, frequency, and type.  There's even one for the "Loo".  It was a dream today to look at the tasks that are ready for me to do.  I could buzz around the whole house or choose to work in one room at a time.  Either way, I found some help for my ADD brain that can't seem to finish any job.  Add in a little extra "mental focus" and an apron and let the power cleaning begin.

Blessings...Healing.

A few nights ago I had the honor and privilege of sitting at my sweet friends table and hearing her story...



I have known my friend Becky since middle school.  If I go through my pictures from high school, she is in many of them.  She was always that friend that I admired.  She was pretty, fit, quite, outgoing, and there was just something that I loved.

As we went through our 20's I didn't see her.

We reconnected a few years ago as I laid on her massage table.  I talked, she listened and with her hands gave me a healing touch.  I had no idea the pain she was holding back.

Over time we became closer and found we are more alike than we ever knew and so different in so many ways.

A few nights ago I had the honor and privilege of listening to her pour our her heart.  She poured it all out with a strength I know I wasn't blessed with.  She did so, so she could do this.  Grab your tissues...

video

I had no idea...
We cut up paper and I wrote her story as she told it.

Privileged...honored...that's is exactly how I feel.

"Her children rise up and call her blessed. Proverbs 31:28  




Walk Humbly

Humble...

How do you really become humble?
How do you know if you have become humble?
Isn't becoming humble something you shouldn't know that you have become?

So many times in the last few weeks I have had the instructions come across my life that are telling me to be humble.

I look at the piles of laundry on my bed to fold and I'm humbled.
I receive more clothes from my friends for my kids and I'm humbled.
I spend time with caregivers of family and I am humbled.
I watch my husband work to provide for us and I am humbled.
Then

Your friend in Christ,

               

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